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Reprinted with permission from THE SHINING LIGHT – July/August, 1988
By Charles M. King
Running an average of twenty – five miles per week, vigorous racquetball games – three times per week: working on weight machines – three times per week, eating the right foods, most of the time; getting things “off my chest” quickly and directly. These were all normal elements of my life-style for a number of years.
From the standpoint of preservation, it might appear that an excellent program was in effect in my life. Never, however, did I expect to have a sure fire case against disease. I only expected these activities to provide quality in my life on a daily basis, nothing more. It’s good that I didn’t have such an expectation because one day in March of 1988, I received word that my body had been invaded by cancer which had originated in the right kidney and was attacking my body, producing blood clots as it spread through the right Renal Vein, into the Vena Cava and on into the left Renal Vein.
As one of the physicians explained the disease, it became apparent that it was a painful chore for him to break this news to my wife and me. He was so shaken that he could barely explain the condition. From observing him, I knew the prognosis could only be dismal. Nonetheless, I sensed myself going out to him with a strong urge to comfort him.
Permit me to digress for a moment to explain something. Since the early days of my Spiritual walk, I concluded that the most important and foremost aspect of one’s Spiritual experience is to develop and maintain a close relationship with God, an effort to which there is no end. Although there are times of discouragement and despairing, I perceived that I must continue the effort because nothing else is as important.
At this moment I sensed the benefits of this previous effort. Although there had been many times in the past when I had benefited from a strong presence of God, it had never been as comforting and as obvious as this. I wanted to reach out and comfort the physician who was having such a difficult time of it. In fact I did help him along as the power of God was there accepting the prognosis in His own strength. All previous effort to grow close to God culminated in that moment. There was no sense of fear or panic, just comfort and power. I sat pensively, taking it all in and mulling it over as the physician spoke.
On subsequent days when moments of sadness and regret occurred, there was the strength to examine circumstances and put them all in perspective.
A week later I was transferred to another hospital where the previous diagnosis was confirmed and surgery was recommended. Following the surgery I was informed that, because of the dangers involved, the surgeon did not alter anything in my body. The cancer was attacking my blood vessels rather aggressively but my body was restructuring itself to work around the obstacles caused by the cancer. The final prognosis was terminal, death expected to occur in six months to one year.
The physicians further informed me that I had a three percent chance of survival but with my “positive attitude,” I might expect slightly better odds. They said it was up to me because there was no medication or treatment, experimental or otherwise, that would be effective in counteracting this type of cancer.
After spending several weeks in a hospital listening to the experts speculate about whether or not I would live or die, I came to certain conclusions about death, the mental/spiritual aspects of healing and prevention of and coping with disease. Perhaps you, the reader, whether you’ve experienced a dread disease or not, might find it beneficial to ponder these factors with me.
DEATH – For several years I had heard it said that “death is a part of life” and “it’s a turning point in the life of a person.” To most of us who are concentrating on living, these statements are distant and therefore do not garner much of our attention.
For many, death is that dread event which we refuse to consider and which is unsettling to reflect upon. Therefore we shove it “out of our minds” for as long as we can.
Although I had given consideration to it previously, death took on a new and personal meaning. It now related directly to me, and, if the physicians were correct, it would come to me soon. Since it was mine to face, I began processing it in my mind and acknowledging its inevitability.
I faced death in all aspects as well as its meaning for me and my family. I concluded that it is something that we all must face and if my time has really come, I would take it. Because of it I could now journey on to see what God has next in store for me. I sensed mixed emotions. First, I was excited about exploring new frontiers, and, secondly I felt sad about leaving those behind whom I love so much – my family and friends. I concluded that we’d all get over the sadness and move on to the next phase of our being. Following this full acknowledgment of death, I focused on the doctor’s estimate of the remaining time. I concluded that if it was indeed accurate, six months is a long time to promise anyone – healthy or ill. Certainly such a period could not be guaranteed, regardless of the condition of health. Even though the physicians estimated six months to a year for me because of my condition, many healthy people would probably die before I would. Life is funny that way.
Predicting life is a very inexact science, I concluded, and so I began to discount the amount of time assigned to me. Since long life has not been guaranteed, I decided I would cram each day with such meaning that no matter what day death comes I’d have to interrupt life to receive it. Under no circumstances would I allow the prognosis to become a self – fulfilling prophecy.
My resulting attitude about death is: If it happens in six month or six years I would live fully each day – loving, creating, helping others, and being productive in other ways.
Having a strong and growing relationship with God, I now believe man has more of a say about what happens to him than I once believed. He must, however, allow himself to reflect on the issues and put them in proper perspective.
MENTAL/SPIRITUAL ASPECTS OF HEALING – As I interacted with the physicians and noted their speculations about the physiological condition of my body, the thought came to me that they were overlooking the most significant aspects of healing – the Spirit working in harmony with the Mind.
The physicians’ prognosis was based almost solely on science and my physiological makeup. Granted, their prognosis would probably be 99% correct if there was no spirit or mind involved. When informed that there was no treatment or medication recommended for my type of cancer, I rejoiced because my future was now left to the Spirit and mind.
Using my mind, I would now have to harmonize with the Spirit to bring about healing in my body. Although I recognized this to be a formidable challenge, I accepted it; even though with awe. It became clear that I must take charge of the healing process. Medical personnel, though very important, could not be in charge because they could not control my mind or work with my Spirit. They simply did not know my spiritual, emotional or mental needs. Based on that aspect of my being with which they were working they hadn’t given me much of a chance. Certainly I could not leave my condition in their hands. Healing takes place in the body and Spirit brings it about. I decided that’s where my focus should be.
In surveying the mental aspects of this healing process, I immediately recognized the need for mental toughness – taking charge of my mind with such strength that my emotions, fears, and actions were under my mind’s control. There simply was no time for letting it wander on major or minor issues, or drifting into unproductive, emotional activity. In short, I needed to keep it as open as possible to Spirit’s leading. There was no time for self-pity or of needless questioning of God as to “Why?” or expressing anger or remorse. It was time to pull it all together and focus on living!
Following the death of his sons and his wife through tragic deaths, Martin Luther King, Sr., said “All of my hatred will not bring my family back.” Rose Kennedy, the mother of John F. Kennedy, was said to have called her family together and remarked: “I don’t know why all these tragedies are in our lives but there’ll be no self-pity practiced in this household.” These are examples of mental toughness; getting on with life and spending as little time as possible on issues that don’t bear relevant fruit. When the announcement of death comes, there is little time for self-pity, anger or worry.
For quite some time it had been clear to me that God is not sitting around deciding who to inflict with the next dread disease. Because of my view on this, I didn’t need to question God about why he’d done this. In my view, God is not a God of disease but a God of wellness, which brings us to the third consideration, prevention.
PREVENTION – We are designed as mental, physical and emotional entities which are inseparably linked to our Spirit. We are designed to function in this universe, being productive and spreading love along the way. In order to do this, we have been given certain design characteristics which, if managed as instructed, we can live healthily. Although God designed us to be healthy, there are times when we will be attached by disease. It seems no matter how cautious we are, we will sometimes be vulnerable to attack.
All of my physical exercise and other precautions did not prevent the onset of cancer. Cancer was about to penetrate my walls of protection and now I must address it and control it. I must call on my mental and spiritual resources to counteract it and work for healing. It’s a circumstance left to Spirit and me.
I have seen those who’s minds were so fixed on living in such a way as to prevent diseases and other undesirable occurrences that when diseases do occur there is nothing left with which to fight. The result is often self-pity and remorse.
Yes, build a program for the prevention of illness and diseases but be certain to have something left to counteract them if they do occur. In sports, athletes are trained to play for perfection but they are also trained to expect the unexpected with the hope that if it comes they will be mentally prepared to counteract it with minimum loss of time so that they can continue on to win. We must act similarly: focus on preventing disease and misfortune but be prepared to fight back and win if you are unexpectedly invaded.
Through the experience of cancer and the subsequent reflections, I have come to realize that cancer is not tantamount to death. The mere fact that there is no certain medical cure is no reason to retreat into defeat and wait death’s overtaking. We have a healing system in our bodies that is activated and energized by Spirit It is clear to me that I should respect it and expect it to work.
Cancer, or any other dread disease, should be viewed as another problem: an accident, to be countered by our God-given problem-solving, healing mechanisms. Although death may be a result, I should do everything possible through these mediums to live.
It is now clear that cancer can be a significant turning point in a person’s life, provided he is not a doomsayer with a fixation on dying. If we as God’s children are to win and overcome life’s adversities, we must do more than recite platitudes and quote comforting scriptures and poems. We must develop plans based on our knowledge and awareness of what God has given us with which to fight. We must commit ourselves to make a difference in the outcome, no matter the gravity of the condition, the related pain or the seeming odds. I know that God is there to work it out with us.
Living is a process whereby we can make far more decisions about its quality than we realize. In our imperfections we make numerous mental and emotional blunders which culminate in unwanted physiological conditions. Whether these conditions are cancer or the common cold, we can be instrumental in calling forth divine intervention that activates our physical organs to counteract such an attack.
My decision to take charge of my own circumstances and to form a team with my physicians was well thought out and I considered the only bases for positive results were hope and faith. Each member of my team was informed that he/she either exercise faith and hope or they couldn’t be on the team. I acknowledged I needed their expertise but it had to be on these terms. They agreed and we are working well together. No mortals can assure us how long we will live. We must accept what has always been true: no certain number of days is guaranteed to us. In light of this, it seems we should live fully each day, praising God for the new day provided us and for the excellent mechanisms we have to bring quality to that day.
Of this one thing I am sure: faith in God and positive effort make a difference in healing as well as in the quality of one’s life – I’m staking my life on it!
THIS YEAR I CELEBRATED MY 21ST YEAR AFTER CANCER
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